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Audrey JoAnn | Content and Copy Writer

Compelling Copy for Female Founders

HOW TO SET SMALL GOALS TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE

August 23, 2018

Is it just me, or can setting ambitious goals feel unattainable or unrealistic at times? Especially those big-picture, long-term goals. Sure, yeah, in 10 years I’d love to own a house in the country and have a couple books published and have a few more figures in the bank and maybe have a mountain home for long weekends and holidays. That’s easy to visualize and dream about all day long, but how in the world do you actually get there?

I believe the key is starting small — like minuscule, the teeniest of tiny — and then building and stacking from there. This realization came to me as all the best ones do: accidentally. It started with flossing.

I’m not kidding you. I had accumulated about eight of those little floss packs from dentist visits that I would use occasionally, but not often enough to get rid of any by the time my next teeth cleaning came around. For the sake of avoiding guilt over throwing away all of those little blue boxes that I do use, sometimes, and that were FREE, I made a choice. I decided I would floss every morning before brushing my teeth until I used up all of my floss packs.

Real earth-shattering, mind-expanding goal setting over here in the Swanson-Skelton household, let me tell you. Truly, have you ever heard of a stupid easier goal than taking a minute to floss? But seriously, it was a new effort for me, since I probably only flossed one or two times a week (or every other week…) before that.

Expending just the extra minute every morning was something. It wasn’t something outrageous, but it was an additional daily effort that I hadn’t been doing before. I’ve been keeping up with this little goal for about three months, and guess what? I still have, like, a million floss packs. But, also! My teeth are whiter, they feel less grimy throughout the day, and I feel a bit better about myself by starting the morning with this refreshing sip of productivity every day.

Most importantly, I can’t imagine NOT flossing my teeth every morning now. I began thinking about why this goal, of all the goals I’ve set for myself in my life, has stuck so solidly, and I found that there are three components in this bitesized objective that I could probably apply to other areas of my life. It’s regular, it’s reachable, and, as I’ve mentioned once or twice, it’s SMALL.

I decided to search for other parts of my day that I could stick in these types of goals. Where could I add something on a regular basis, that didn’t feel like an everyday Everest (reachable), and that didn’t take an hour, or even 30 minutes, of my time…small?

If you’re anything like me, if a new thing takes too much time, it probably won’t be sticking around for long. I like my free time, and I like my routines, and shaking them up with discomfort or a new project is often a difficult mental hurdle to get over every single day. At least for me.

Shockingly (read: not shockingly), however, there were plenty of areas throughout my day to stick in these Post-It-sized goals.

In the mornings, I’ve committed to reading one chapter of a personal development book every day before sitting down at my desk to work. Right now, I’m reading Brene Brown’s “Braving the Wilderness.” To be completely honest, I’ve been reading it for the last seven months. I hadn’t read it in the last five because “I don’t have time” or “There are more important things to do than read during the day.”

Truth is, if I leave reading — especially books that expand my mindset and push me to pursue more in life, but are also a little more abstract and slow-going than, say, murder mysteries — until nighttime, I read two paragraphs and pass the heck out, absorbing almost none of the goodness among those pages. Ask John. I read thrillers at night, and even those can’t keep me up longer than a page or two.

Reading ONE CHAPTER in the mornings takes 10 to 15 minutes of my time. Time that would probably be spent on Instagram as I drink my coffee, if I’m still being totally honest. This little goal has really become quite a precious buddy of mine.

Another one that John and I are committing to is both sharing three things that are exclusive to each day that we are thankful for. So, we can’t say “health, family, and shelter” every day, and we’re forced to think of three items special to every particular day, which poses us in a place of gratitude at the end of even our worst days with a less-than-5-minute-long exercise.

Between that and all this reading and flossing going on, it’s like, who do I think I am? Miss America? It’s good stuff, y’all.

Maybe you have even less bandwidth or tolerance than I do for new, daily goals that could expand your health, mind, or worldview. Sorry, but I’m still going to challenge you to find something — anything (remember how mine started with stinking flossing?!) — and roll with it. But, make me a promise, only start with one thing.

Try listening to a podcast on entrepreneurship or communication on your way to work, eating vegetarian one meal a day, rolling out of bed and doing 25 push-ups and crunches right there on the floor, taking your dog on a walk around the block after dinner every night, subscribing to a new uplifting newsletter that you don’t delete before reading every day, taking off your makeup every night, meditating for five minutes before driving to work — whatever it is, stick to it for a week and then see what happens. (I know what will happen.)

I’ve seen this play out for myself and it has been so transformative with how I go about my day. Start with one that takes 10 minutes or less, make it a non-negotiable part of your routine, and then eventually add another. This stacking of goals will eventually shape your days into something heartening, fulfilling, and productive for so many areas of your life. I’m not saying it’ll get you that mountain home in 10 years, but I’m also not not saying that. Give it a shot, you guys. Or a floss.

I would love more ideas for goal-stacking in my own life! Tell me all about the little goals you’ve already been accomplishing in your day-to-day, and ones you want to start pursuing, in a comment below or in an email: audreyswanson10@gmail.com.

Navy blue polka dot maxi dress: Lulus / Open-toe nude booties with fringe zipper: Lulus / Dainty triangle necklace: Tribe Alive

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Welcome! I'm Audrey, and I adore connecting with female founders and telling their stories in a way that matters & lasts for years to come.

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audskelton

Who do you think was more excited about this day t Who do you think was more excited about this day trip out to the coast... us or Wallace? 😅😂 I love them. Also, I can’t get over the burp cloth on John’s shoulder. Ya know, just in case. #newparentlife
One hour, just us two in our backyard with a big c One hour, just us two in our backyard with a big charcuterie board, a deck of cards, a couple glasses of rosé, and no baby monitor. 🤎

The first week of Wallace’s life? I ached even being in another room from him (#hormones). I was a wreck of emotions and had legitimate baby tunnel vision... preeeetty much nothing else mattered. But things have been balancing out this past week, and today was so needed.

My mom is in town all month and watched Wally for us so we could have some time just us two—yep, in the backyard because of shelter in place restrictions from COVID. (Plus let’s be real... I’m not quite ready for an out-of-the-house date yet anyway. 😂)

As much as I desire to be a present + loving mama and ambitious business owner, it’s just as important to me to prioritize our marriage with little moments like this to just be in each other’s presence (and not just talk about burping and swaddling and bedtime routines, like most of our recent convos).

Here’s to (almost) 2 weeks of being parents, @the_beermonger. I think we’ll do okay.
My two favorite guys in the world. 🤍🌎 My two favorite guys in the world. 🤍🌎
Me, trying to figure out what to do with my hands Me, trying to figure out what to do with my hands without a bump. 👐🏼 Wallace, trying to figure out what we’re doing out of the house. 🤨

First family walk in the books! All of 10 minutes. 🤪 (Also, does anyone else notice the rainbow over Wally?... My heart. 🌈🥺)
1 week old. 🤎 The hardest, most emotional & mos 1 week old. 🤎 The hardest, most emotional & most rewarding week of my life. Babies’ sleep schedules, y’all. They are not for the faint of heart.

Wallace is hitting all his milestones, has learned the alphabet, and is picking up Latin. Just kidding. But he CAN poop 3 times in an hour and a half 😎, and he eats like a champ, is so strong that we prefer to tag team diaper changes for now, and makes the sweetest, cutest noises all day long. (And night.) Like even his cry is cute. 😩

One of my friends called this time the “wet weeks”: urine, breast milk, spit up, night sweats, tears, blood, more tears. It’s a lot, and it’s temporary. So even in the hard moments, we are reminding ourselves that the hardest things are often the best things. 

And this really has been the best thing.

So, so thankful for a hands-on husband who’s been so involved in everything... there’s something indescribable about watching your partner care for your child and step into a big, new role like this so gracefully. And we are thankful for ALL of the support, near and far (... mostly far), from our family and friends and coworkers. What a week... here’s to continuing to figure it all out together as a family. 😌
At 5 a.m. my water broke and at 3:44 p.m. our worl At 5 a.m. my water broke and at 3:44 p.m. our worlds and hearts were changed forever. Everything in between was a gritty, fast-moving tidal wave of emotion, pain, instinct, and a kind of love I never could’ve imagined.

Welcome, Wallace Ronal Skelton. 🤎 You kept us waiting until you decided, very quickly, you’d like to be here. I’m still in disbelief that you are ours. 

January 4, 2021 • 7 lbs 4 oz • 20.5 inches • Sweet as can be.
Well, this baby friend doesn’t exactly have our Well, this baby friend doesn’t exactly have our sense of punctuality which realllly threw me for a loop after thinking & saying for months that I was certain he/she would get here early. I’ve drank 3 boxes of raspberry leaf tea in 3 weeks, walked dozens of miles, eaten way too many dates, done hundreds of squats and bench step-ups... and now I’m surrendering. You come whenever you feel like it, little one. I’m comfy enough and can still sleep through the night (minus a bathroom break or two) so we will just keep on waiting and letting you teach us our first lesson of parenthood: PATIENCE. I knew I could always use some more of it. 😉 #40weekspregnant #pregnancy
scenes from our blissful, muddy, much-needed morni scenes from our blissful, muddy, much-needed morning hike. ☀️🍂 in a year that’s felt like 5, getting outside whenever we can has been my favorite way to reset. so thankful to live in such gorgeous surroundings!
our first and probably only christmas just us thre our first and probably only christmas just us three! quiet and simple and a little sad but mostly filled with hope and gratitude. hope yours is special in all the best ways. 🤍
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