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Audrey JoAnn | Content and Copy Writer

Compelling Copy for Female Founders

SELF CARE IS NOT SELFISH

September 13, 2018

self care benefits

The other week, I drove to this field of wild sunflowers outside of my neighborhood with a pair of scissors and snipped about a dozen of those golden beauties to take home with me. I had just bought a new vase and couldn’t wait to set up these freshly picked flowers on a bookshelf to brighten our living room. So thrifty am I — I didn’t need a $9 bouquet from Whole Foods! All I needed was some scissors and the patience and grit to pull stickers off the ankles of my socks for 15 minutes when I got home. In the field, which is more of an overgrown empty lot, I cut the flowers from their mother stems, and each oozed with sticky juice that even the strongest of dish soap with water couldn’t remove from my hands when I got home.

I also realized, after a short drive back to the house, I transported a couple of small, eight-legged friends home with the flowers. When I saw the spiders scuttling and burrowing deeper into the center of the sunflowers, I promptly freaked out, dropped the bouquet in the kitchen sink, and gave them a quick rinse. Mentally, I’m still scarred that they were IN THE CAR ON MY LAP for approximately three minutes. Finally, my quick attempt at a free spruce-up of my living room came to a close when I patted them dry with a paper towel, filled my gorgeous new vase with water, placed them on their new shelf home, and prayed the spiders had found their new home — down the drain.

The flowers died the next day.

All of that for yellow pollen dusting the surfaces of everything within a two-foot radius of the vase and a short afternoon of some added beauty — oh, and trauma. You and I actually aren’t too different from these flowers, though. We have all of this beauty and value to offer, but we spend time putting others’ goals and happiness first, whether it’s at work or at home or among family and friends, that we’re sucked dry and left unfulfilled.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL ROCK BOTTOM TO PRIORITIZE YOU

The darkest period in my adult life was when I felt stuck at a job and wasn’t pursuing anything for me. I had changed jobs a couple of times before this particular one, and didn’t want to be that person (okay, that millennial) who couldn’t stick with a job for longer than five minutes. So, I went to work every morning and my eyes glazed over in front of my computer screen for eight hours before going home at the end of the day with almost no energy left to spend time with friends, workout, or even cook myself dinner.

I’d sit on my couch and stare at another screen, the TV, usually with a glass of wine and some variation of snacks that I excused as my dinner (olives, crackers, and cheese is kind of a well-balanced meal, if you really think about it), before going to bed and doing the same thing the next day. I was draining myself of joy and self-worth because I didn’t think I had any other options. In fact, I told myself I didn’t have any other options, and that I should just try to stick it out for at least two years. Then, I could work on being happy.

Obviously, the routine I had created was not a sustainable one. Two years wouldn’t be reachable if I could hardly make it through a month, let alone a week. In a way, I was that sunflower that had been snipped, and was busy oozing negativity and allowing others’ maybe nonexistent opinions of me burrow deep into my heart. I wasn’t happy, and I certainly wasn’t living. I was frozen. It was around this time that a few people suggested seeing a professional who could help me sort out my stuckness and sickness. Going to therapy taught me a few things, most prominently that we are never stuck in our unhappiness.

LET’S NOT TRY TO FIGURE OUT AND FIX ALL THE THINGS ALONE

My therapist pushed me to prioritize things like creating and writing content that made me feel excited and full, even if I didn’t do that at my 9-to-5. I started a blog. She encouraged me to seek ways to take care of myself even at the place that made me feel miserable, work. I began listening to true crime and self help podcasts (a little something to feed all parts of my wacky brain) while I worked on Excel spreadsheets all day.

I’d force myself to wake up early a few days a week to workout, because Lord knows it ain’t going to happen if I leave it until 6 p.m., and discovered that I could sustain energy longer throughout the day. I found a church and listened to worship music and learned to pray, like really pray and have conversations about all my dreams and desires and fears. I’d sit in my closet in the mornings and earnestly chat to God before continuing on with my day.

And, slowly, my life began to transform. It wasn’t one special thing that changed me. It was everything, on purpose, and on a regular basis. The whole prioritization of myself and the things that make my soul brighter made me feel a little less bitter about a job I disliked and a lot more enthusiastic about my life overall.

I think a lot of us feel bad when we prioritize ourselves and put “me” first. If you’ve never reached a super-low, where staying in bed all day kind of sounds like the greatest possible option, it can be even harder to see the full benefits of personal care and to not view it as self-centered. But I beg you to consider the things that make you feel better — maybe it’s going for a run 3 days a week, or painting in the evening, or taking 5 minutes to journal in the morning — and to commit to yourself to do those things regularly. Not once, not for a week, but consistently. Habitually. Ritually. Your life will skyrocket, I promise.

And if you’re currently in a sticky area or a slump, I cannot praise and offer the support of therapy strongly enough. That third party listener and idea-maker will give you real, unflinching feedback and insight into your possible blindspots. See the therapist. Do the workout. Cook the meal. Find the church. Keep living life in the sunny, warm field (instead of a cold vase), and in turn, your relationships, work life, and contentment will improve in strides along the way.

What are your favorite methods of self care and prioritizing you? Tell me everything!

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Welcome! I'm Audrey, and I adore connecting with female founders and telling their stories in a way that matters & lasts for years to come.

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audskelton

The secret to describing your coaching service, pr The secret to describing your coaching service, product, offer, course, etc. online = talking about the amazing end result your thing will provide buyers. That’s it. 

Never ever ever *lead* with:

✖️You get 50 pages of content!
✖️ There’s over 10 hours of video instruction!
✖️ A free workbook comes with!
✖️ You’ll be added to my private FB group!
✖️ 12 modules waiting for you!
✖️ ... or anything regarding the FEATURES of your product/service. 

(And especially don’t list every single feature as the full caption, please for the love of Pete. 🥱) Think of those items as the fine print. Logical buyers maaaay be interested, but most people care way more about what your offer can change or improve for them. What specific result will it give them? What will it make them feel, help them achieve, allow them to excel at??

The logistical details can go at the bottom of your sales page—and honestly, just totally remove them from your social posts and CTAs.

Trust me... *I know how valuable those detail pieces feel and SEEM from your perspective as the creator* because it shows the hard work and effort you put into your offer. But talking about how much content is inside your product doesn’t mean ANYTHING unless people understand what that content can do for them. So always, aaaalways lead with that.

*steps off soapbox* 

Side note, this picture is from forever ago and is making me majorly ready to cut my hair again. 😂 Should I go for the mom chop?! ✂️
The absolute loves of my life. 🤎 Can’t wait t The absolute loves of my life. 🤎 Can’t wait to see what these two peas in a pod get into for years and years to come.
Our little buddy turned 3 months old yesterday and Our little buddy turned 3 months old yesterday and I can hardly believe it. These few months have simultaneously flown by and felt like a year. Wallace has grown so much and even though you always hear parents say stop growing so fast, I feel almost the opposite. I feel such pride with each new roll he develops, the strength his neck is gaining, and his belly that just keeps expanding. Is this weird?! Regardless, it’s been my greatest joy to watch him grow and his personality begin to emerge. The way he smiles and chuckles when we quack or say “WHOA!” The rapid-fire kicks he does when he has room to sprawl out. His love for walks and disdain for car rides. 🥴 It’s all so fun and special and new (for all of us!), and I wouldn’t trade a moment for anything in the world. 🤎
Jesus’s return is the most precious miracle of m Jesus’s return is the most precious miracle of miracles... but the fact that we’re all facing the camera and even (kind of) smiling in this SELF-TIMER pic is a pretty close second. 😆🥲 Happy Easter and sending you so much love and joy! 🤎
Everything is temporary. It’s been my mantra thr Everything is temporary. It’s been my mantra through the hardest and sweetest moments these past few months, and even more so as I ease back into work this week.

It’s all temporary. The good, the bad, the big emotions, the tenderest moments, the hard days, the beautiful days, the teeny socks, the endless emails, the nap strikes, the stacked deadline weeks, the sweet bonding of nursing.

None of it will be around forever, and even though I probably won’t have my schedule figured out for a long, long time, that doesn’t mean these days of just getting by and praying it all works out aren’t important.

They’ll be gritty, cobbled-together, and messy. But they’re mine. I get to craft these days however I want to, with the sweetest babe on my hip and my honey in our back office chasing his own dream, and that’s a beautiful thing.
Vacations hit different with a baby, that is for s Vacations hit different with a baby, that is for sure. 🤪 The days revolve around naps and feedings, and afternoons that we once would have spent taking 4-mile hikes or sitting on a patio at a brewery are now spent reading, playing cards, and listening to Kacey Musgraves and Tom Petty in our Airbnb while Wally snoozes. It’s not worse, but it’s a different pace than I’m used to and that’s okay. In fact, it’s probably more needed than I realize as I wrap up my maternity leave and get back to work in a couple days. Grateful for these slow days and sweet memories with my loves. Now... we just have to make the 4-hour drive home tomorrow with a dog and baby who both hate the car. 🤣 (PS... I’m sharing more thoughts about how I feel heading back to work in this week’s newsletter that goes out Friday—you can sign up to get emails from me with copywriting tips, business anecdotes, and some life updates too in the link in my bio! ☺️) #babysfirstvacation #laketahoe
flannels + chunky sweaters + squishy babies + gorg flannels + chunky sweaters + squishy babies + gorgeous views = my aesthetic forever and ever. 😍
When I was little, I said I wanted 4 kids, just li When I was little, I said I wanted 4 kids, just like my own family. I wanted a girl, boy and girl twins, and a boy. (‘Cause you can totally plan those things. 🥴)

Then, my parents got divorced and in my angsty teenager-ness, I was like, “Nope, nevermind. I’m good with no kids thanks!”

I didn’t want the pressure of raising someone and somehow damaging or disappointing them. And I was skeptical that a couple could stay together and happily raise a family.

When John and I started dating, he was so confident in us and our future. I’d never met a guy who a) pursued me so openly and consistently and b) made me feel valued in every area of my life. Career, relationship, family, health, faith.

When we went on our first camping trip about a year into dating, we were having one of those deep, wine-fueled campfire chats that seem extra important and lovely. I asked him how he knew he first loved me.

He was so good at always complimenting my drive and ambition, or how I looked regardless of whether I was dressed up or grungy after a workout. I figured it would be a combination of those sorts of things, but he surprised me when he said, “Because I know you’ll be a good mom.”

Uhhhh, what? I was like, “... But you know I’m not even sure I want to be a mom. How can you see that?”

He said in the way I so deeply care for others and myself. He had this unwavering belief that we could build a family, and he wanted this girl who spent a lot of years feeling broken to lead it alongside him.

I know this doesn’t sound very “progressive,” but his faith in me being a good mom healed a part of me in so many ways.

I always knew I was driven. I knew I could build a career and life I loved. But I didn’t believe I could build a family that lasted. Or at least, I was scared to think what might happen if I tried.

Wallace is absolutely the best thing that has ever happened to me. He made me the mom that John believed I could be more than five years ago.

I don’t know if you ever necessarily feel “good” at being a parent, because every day is filled with mistakes & learning curves, but I will say that it’s the most immediately natural I’ve felt in any role I’ve stepped into, ever.
Would it be too much to gallery wall an entire hou Would it be too much to gallery wall an entire house? Asking for a friend.

Newborn family photos by my talented, sweet friend @jilliangoulding. She is too good! 🤍
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