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Audrey JoAnn | Content and Copy Writer

Compelling Copy for Female Founders

Please Stop Telling Women To Smile

December 16, 2015

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The other morning, I was walking the three blocks from where I park in downtown Dallas to my office when a man walking toward me on the sidewalk shouted,”Try a smile,” at me. I hadn’t even noticed him until he commanded this facial expression from me, and after a quick glance to find I was the only person in his vicinity, in automatic response, I gave him a tight-lipped grin that couldn’t have looked at all like a happy smile.

“There you go,” he told me encouragingly, returning a wide beam, and I walked on past him without a word, mad at myself for acknowledging this stranger’s bossiness with even a half-smile. Why is it that I need to be smiling as I walk my daily five-minute stroll to the office building? Why would anyone feel the need to tell me to do so as I mind my own business during my usual route to work?

The sage 14-year-old actress Rowan Blanchard is just as aggravated with strangers telling her to smile more, except instead of approaching her on the street, they’re commenting en masse on her Instagram page. “If I want to smile I will,” she Tweeted on Nov. 29. “Nothing more than that.”

But there is more than that. People inherently think women are sad or upset or, as Blanchard explained in another Tweet, depressed if they aren’t smiling in every picture or as they walk in public, which is plain ignorant and frankly stupid. People assuming automatically that non-smiling women are depressed is a serious thing, because depression is serious and should not be tossed around just because someone’s face doesn’t look like what society defines as joy.

Not smiling can mean someone is being thoughtful, creative, meditational, pensive, inspired, artful, tired, or a million other things that aren’t feelings of depression or being upset, whereas people who do decide to be open about depression are oftentimes told they’re being overreactive (another point made by Blanchard). Smiling, or not smiling, is an individual choice, just like any other action and reaction — so why do some people insist on demanding it so casually and so often, specifically from women?

Historically, women have been made to be creatures who please others, and while a facial expression seems like not a big deal in relation to other gender issues, it is. Human emotion is a right to be expressed individually whenever a person feels like expressing it — it is not something to be dictated by another person who would feel a little better if I slapped on a happier face because he asked me to do so. So, please, don’t tell me to smile. I will when I feel like it. And if I look depressed or have “resting bitch face,” I don’t really care if that hurts your feelings.

Bye, Felicia.

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Poncho: Old Navy (Sold out: similar here and here) // Jeans: Target // Booties: Dolce by Mojo Moxy via Francesca’s // Sunglasses: Target // Necklace: Tribe Alive (Old, but all their jewelry is stunning and hand-crafted, and supports an amazing cause.) // Lipstick: L’Oreal “Divine Wine”

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Welcome! I'm Audrey, and I adore connecting with female founders and telling their stories in a way that matters & lasts for years to come.

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audskelton

Who do you think was more excited about this day t Who do you think was more excited about this day trip out to the coast... us or Wallace? 😅😂 I love them. Also, I can’t get over the burp cloth on John’s shoulder. Ya know, just in case. #newparentlife
One hour, just us two in our backyard with a big c One hour, just us two in our backyard with a big charcuterie board, a deck of cards, a couple glasses of rosé, and no baby monitor. 🤎

The first week of Wallace’s life? I ached even being in another room from him (#hormones). I was a wreck of emotions and had legitimate baby tunnel vision... preeeetty much nothing else mattered. But things have been balancing out this past week, and today was so needed.

My mom is in town all month and watched Wally for us so we could have some time just us two—yep, in the backyard because of shelter in place restrictions from COVID. (Plus let’s be real... I’m not quite ready for an out-of-the-house date yet anyway. 😂)

As much as I desire to be a present + loving mama and ambitious business owner, it’s just as important to me to prioritize our marriage with little moments like this to just be in each other’s presence (and not just talk about burping and swaddling and bedtime routines, like most of our recent convos).

Here’s to (almost) 2 weeks of being parents, @the_beermonger. I think we’ll do okay.
My two favorite guys in the world. 🤍🌎 My two favorite guys in the world. 🤍🌎
Me, trying to figure out what to do with my hands Me, trying to figure out what to do with my hands without a bump. 👐🏼 Wallace, trying to figure out what we’re doing out of the house. 🤨

First family walk in the books! All of 10 minutes. 🤪 (Also, does anyone else notice the rainbow over Wally?... My heart. 🌈🥺)
1 week old. 🤎 The hardest, most emotional & mos 1 week old. 🤎 The hardest, most emotional & most rewarding week of my life. Babies’ sleep schedules, y’all. They are not for the faint of heart.

Wallace is hitting all his milestones, has learned the alphabet, and is picking up Latin. Just kidding. But he CAN poop 3 times in an hour and a half 😎, and he eats like a champ, is so strong that we prefer to tag team diaper changes for now, and makes the sweetest, cutest noises all day long. (And night.) Like even his cry is cute. 😩

One of my friends called this time the “wet weeks”: urine, breast milk, spit up, night sweats, tears, blood, more tears. It’s a lot, and it’s temporary. So even in the hard moments, we are reminding ourselves that the hardest things are often the best things. 

And this really has been the best thing.

So, so thankful for a hands-on husband who’s been so involved in everything... there’s something indescribable about watching your partner care for your child and step into a big, new role like this so gracefully. And we are thankful for ALL of the support, near and far (... mostly far), from our family and friends and coworkers. What a week... here’s to continuing to figure it all out together as a family. 😌
At 5 a.m. my water broke and at 3:44 p.m. our worl At 5 a.m. my water broke and at 3:44 p.m. our worlds and hearts were changed forever. Everything in between was a gritty, fast-moving tidal wave of emotion, pain, instinct, and a kind of love I never could’ve imagined.

Welcome, Wallace Ronal Skelton. 🤎 You kept us waiting until you decided, very quickly, you’d like to be here. I’m still in disbelief that you are ours. 

January 4, 2021 • 7 lbs 4 oz • 20.5 inches • Sweet as can be.
Well, this baby friend doesn’t exactly have our Well, this baby friend doesn’t exactly have our sense of punctuality which realllly threw me for a loop after thinking & saying for months that I was certain he/she would get here early. I’ve drank 3 boxes of raspberry leaf tea in 3 weeks, walked dozens of miles, eaten way too many dates, done hundreds of squats and bench step-ups... and now I’m surrendering. You come whenever you feel like it, little one. I’m comfy enough and can still sleep through the night (minus a bathroom break or two) so we will just keep on waiting and letting you teach us our first lesson of parenthood: PATIENCE. I knew I could always use some more of it. 😉 #40weekspregnant #pregnancy
scenes from our blissful, muddy, much-needed morni scenes from our blissful, muddy, much-needed morning hike. ☀️🍂 in a year that’s felt like 5, getting outside whenever we can has been my favorite way to reset. so thankful to live in such gorgeous surroundings!
our first and probably only christmas just us thre our first and probably only christmas just us three! quiet and simple and a little sad but mostly filled with hope and gratitude. hope yours is special in all the best ways. 🤍
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