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Audrey JoAnn

Writer ● Adventurer ● Storyteller

SELF CARE IS NOT SELFISH

September 13, 2018

self care benefits

The other week, I drove to this field of wild sunflowers outside of my neighborhood with a pair of scissors and snipped about a dozen of those golden beauties to take home with me. I had just bought a new vase and couldn’t wait to set up these freshly picked flowers on a bookshelf to brighten our living room. So thrifty am I — I didn’t need a $9 bouquet from Whole Foods! All I needed was some scissors and the patience and grit to pull stickers off the ankles of my socks for 15 minutes when I got home. In the field, which is more of an overgrown empty lot, I cut the flowers from their mother stems, and each oozed with sticky juice that even the strongest of dish soap with water couldn’t remove from my hands when I got home.

I also realized, after a short drive back to the house, I transported a couple of small, eight-legged friends home with the flowers. When I saw the spiders scuttling and burrowing deeper into the center of the sunflowers, I promptly freaked out, dropped the bouquet in the kitchen sink, and gave them a quick rinse. Mentally, I’m still scarred that they were IN THE CAR ON MY LAP for approximately three minutes. Finally, my quick attempt at a free spruce-up of my living room came to a close when I patted them dry with a paper towel, filled my gorgeous new vase with water, placed them on their new shelf home, and prayed the spiders had found their new home — down the drain.

The flowers died the next day.

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EVERYONE HAS TO SETTLE — TO SOME EXTENT

September 6, 2018

I remember in high school, my friends and I made these long, detailed lists of all the things we wanted in our future boyfriends. (Were we losers? Probably.) Some of the more low-key adjectives included honest, athletic, tall, funny, smart, blue eyes, musical, educated, talkative, supportive, well-read, interested in the same hobbies as me, loves his family but not a mama’s boy, sweet but not clingy, and pisses gold, basically. We were just some seriously low-maintenance gals describing a fictional being.

There are plenty of incredible, talented, kind men out there, but I promise there is not one, who isn’t Jesus himself, who fits our long lists of must-haves. And guess what? I don’t fit the female version of this list of qualities that make up the perfect partner, either.

I can be jealous and passive aggressive while my hair and makeup looks like Beyonce’s, or I can be compassionate and a good listener even though I haven’t washed my hair in four days and have five pimples. None of us are constant; none of us bring the same strengths and wins every day. And what a relief! I would not want the pressure of perfection day in and out.

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HOW TO SET SMALL GOALS TO CHANGE YOUR LIFE

August 23, 2018

Is it just me, or can setting ambitious goals feel unattainable or unrealistic at times? Especially those big-picture, long-term goals. Sure, yeah, in 10 years I’d love to own a house in the country and have a couple books published and have a few more figures in the bank and maybe have a mountain home for long weekends and holidays. That’s easy to visualize and dream about all day long, but how in the world do you actually get there?

I believe the key is starting small — like minuscule, the teeniest of tiny — and then building and stacking from there. This realization came to me as all the best ones do: accidentally. It started with flossing.

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Hi, there! I'm Audrey. I write blog and email content for female service-based small businesses and creative entrepreneurs. I'm also a professional over-sharer. Welcome to my weird little world. Rosé, correct grammar, and snacks are always welcome here.

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audskelton

Instagram post 2185045713348363765_10260814 Another weekend of exploring, wine tasting, church, rest, ramen, house cleaning, a bath for Piper, and a little work in the books. Aka, my perfect weekend??? Also, I don’t ever want to take off these boots. Ever. The end. Happy Monday and HAPPY THANKSGIVING WEEK! The holidays are here and I am so very happy about it. ☺️✨
Instagram post 2180077453809017638_10260814 In honor of turning 28, I decided to write down 28 things you may or may not know about me... 🎉🥂
1. My middle name is JoAnn, but I didn’t know if there was an ‘e’ at the end for like 16 years. 😬
2. Gray is my favorite color. (I know.)
3. I’ve been writing full-time for a year and a half.
4. I purposefully choose to only work with women entrepreneurs whose missions are to help others.
5. I drink about a gallon of water a day.
6. I also drink a lot of wine (but not every day).
7. I could watch Parenthood over and over again.
8. I am so not attached to things and compulsively give stuff away. 🤦🏼‍♀️
9. Growing up, I always said I’d never get married or have kids.
10. Money doesn’t motivate me, but freedom does.
11. I’m either extremely focused or extremely lazy; I don’t really have a middle ground. 🙃
12. I love being alone. Lol.
13. Cooking with a podcast playing and a glass of rosé in hand is my idea of heaven.
14. @myfavoritemurder is the only podcast I don’t get sick of.
15. I get (and love) Botox.
16. I was vegetarian for 7 years.
17. I got certified to teach yoga when I was 15 years old.
18. I’m the youngest of 4.
19. My sister also likes to remind me I was the “unplanned” fourth. 😂
20. My grandparents are my heroes.
21. I read every single day—gotta keep up with them words, y’know?
22. I am EXTREMELY loyal and protective of my loved ones.
23. I hate to ask for help or bother people.
24. I try to move my body for 30 minutes every day.
25. I interned at Teen Vogue when I was 19.
26. My weakness is cheddar popcorn.
27. My pet peeve is when people don’t listen.
28. I am fixated by all things @bravotv.
As a little b-day gift, would you please leave a little something something interesting/fascinating/weird about you? 🥳🎁 Thanks for all the warm wishes and love. I love y’all. ✨
Instagram post 2179571568460430761_10260814 Last day as a 27 year old wasn’t so bad. Looking forward to 28. ☺️
Instagram post 2178634202199548697_10260814 Never not channeling this moment. ✨ This week has been full and fast and a bit overwhelming. I found myself complaining... a lot. Even as I sat with John last night enjoying a glass of wine. I listened to myself saying I don’t feel confident in some parts of my business and my body hurts and I’m busier than ever and our dog has been horrible lately and, and, and. And there will ALWAYS be things to complain about when we pick apart the details of our lives. But big picture? When I look at all the good that fills up my days—even the smallest things like morning walks and working in my coziest sweats and sipping my Nespresso as I chug away at my dreams—and all the opportunities I’ve been able to pursue, it’s like, holy shit. What am I even stressing about?! As T Swift would say, you need to calm down. So here I am, calmly and contently working on a Saturday but grateful to be able to and knowing this isn’t a weekly norm. (AND, also pretending I’m sitting poolside with a floppy hat and jalapeño margarita, for good measure.) Happy weekend to you. ☀️
Instagram post 2175121518887830575_10260814 I love this life we’re just beginning to build. ☺️
Instagram post 2172919921537463700_10260814 “Wow, Jenna Kutcher just posted an insta story saying she’s hiring a writer... should I apply?” I asked John late one night in bed earlier this year. Before waiting for his response, I’d already swiped up and followed the link to the LinkedIn application. In 5 minutes, I submitted my stuff, and in less than 24 hours, she offered me the role.

I’ve worked remotely on her content alongside a driven and brilliant group of women that makes up her team since April. This week I got to hug and meet each of them face to face for the first time, and I was blown away by the immediate familiarity and bond we had. Like, it’s been a day and I MISS these women I just met. 😂 We spent the days laughing and sipping margaritas by the pool, sharing our dreams for 2020 and beyond, and listening to each other’s stories and lives in a way that Slack really doesn’t allow.

And I have to admit, with a group of 10 women, I imagined there might be some competition or guarded energy, maybe a little clique-iness to navigate this week. That’s been my experience with large groups of women, anyway. (Because does high school ever truly end?!) But I should have known... Jenna isn’t about that kind of community. Every single woman who she’s hired on is warm and inviting, hilarious and inspiring in their own way. I felt like I was able to get to know each of them genuinely and found myself in awe of their stories. And that’s such a testament to the brand and business @jennakutcher has built, from her team to her students and audience and beyond. It’s about connection and impact and possibility, and she’s built a team that literally thrives and emotes allll of that. And I don’t think I’ll ever get over being a part of it. ✌🏼
Instagram post 2170189151853125726_10260814 Heading out on a quick gals-only retreat with one of my favorite clients and her whole team tomorrow, and I AM STOKED.

The truth is... I don’t embrace present moments very well. I’m constantly thinking about and planning out the next thing I need to do, or want to do. I often realize the beauty and blessing of the most special times way later on, failing to soak them up in the moment.

But this? Getting to travel and hang out with a group of powerful, strong women whose communal goal is to serve + improve the lives of others? I’m breathing it in for what it is, and it’s kind of everything I could hope for in creating my career.
Instagram post 2164749803406093536_10260814 Get you some girlfriends who are cool with losing power, getting evacuated in the middle of the night, not knowing where to go, snacking on Cheetos in a parked car for an hour and a half, having nowhere to stay, and still making the most of it. This weekend was NUTS, but I haven’t laughed so hard or had this much fun having my plans totally upended, ummm, ever.

Two of my dearest friends from college came to visit for the last few days, and I had planned allll the things: hiking through the redwoods, visiting Bodega Bay, wine tastings, local restaurants, yoga. I warned them about the Kincade Fire north of Santa Rosa before they got here but assured them we would be fine in the Airbnb we booked for our girls weekend in a town that seemed far enough away from the blazes. It ended up that many of our plans were canceled due to restaurants and wineries closing down from the smoke and employees facing evacuations, and then our Airbnb lost power Saturday night. And at 4 am Sunday morning, John called to tell me the town I was in was now being evacuated and to “just go south.” He’d meet us there because he was soon evacuated, too.

Now, I LOVE a plan. Like need one, live by one, feel most settled when I have one. But someone, somewhere (lookin’ at you, God) is letting me know that it is OKAY to not have a plan always. To figure things out as you go. To find joy in some of the most shitty situations. To focus more on being together in this moment than anticipating and worrying about what’s next.

Right now, we can only plan for the next day. We found an Airbnb to stay in 1.5 hours south of the fires last night, and my friends headed home this morning. Another strong wind is coming in tomorrow, which means the fires likely won’t be under control until later this week, if then. We don’t know when we will be able to go home. And yet, I’m okay. The people who matter most to me (and Piper 🖤) are okay, and I feel so much more concerned and sad about these fires that are devastating and ravishing land and homes and vineyards that have been around for decades in Sonoma County. If you pray, this county could sure use your prayers now. That’s my biggest plan for now.
Instagram post 2159803586007939677_10260814 A year ago, we ate tacos and pumpkin cake in a gray barn outside of Austin with all our family and friends showering us with love and lavender, and a cover band who really loved Bruno Mars. My aunt married us beneath a grove of oak trees after a string ensemble played “Mess is Mine” by Vance Joy as I walked toward you with my parents. It wasn’t a perfect day or the most traditional, but it was perfectly ‘us’ and that’s what I remember most fondly.

This year has brought more change and adventure than we ever could’ve imagined. It’s been challenging and emotional and messy and so very fun, joyful, and rewarding, beginning to build a life with you. And I can’t wait to see what’s in store next after the whirlwind that was year one.

I’ve always said you’re the man who changed my mind about relationships and love. You showed me what faithfulness and compassion look like, and you continue to. Thank you for being patient and honest and steady, and for knowing all the best ways to cheer me up and cheer me on. And for laughing at all my jokes, too. (Even the fake laugh. 😉) Let’s keep messing up and making up and figuring this life thing out forever, okay @the_beermonger?
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